Walking, Waiting, and Writing with God
A few years ago, I sat at the dining table with my laptop, scribbled notes, dozens of typed pages from a manuscript, and several pens scattered before me. There was a moment where I felt completely at peace. It was like a warm blanket wrapping around me. In that moment there was no doubt in my being that I was doing what I was called to do. It was God's peace gently assuring me that I was on the path He called me on. So I stepped out in faith and wrote.
But the feeling faded. I struggle with doubt and fear. I looked at all the things that came with being a writer: rejection, critiques, pitching to agents, editors, publishers, marketing, platforms; and became overwhelmed. In my mind, it took a strong person to put themselves out there, their precious work out there. It took a confident person to be rejected but stay the course. I felt it took a person so secure with themselves that nothing could sway them. That person was not me. I'm insecure. I'm highly introverted. I'm really sensitive. Or so I thought. Two weekends ago, God showed me a whole new me.
I was blessed to attend the 50th Mount Hermon Christian Writers Conference. Not only did I come home with a mind expanded with writing knowledge but knowledge of how God sees me. I can not tell you how many times I looked at myself in a mirror that weekend and said, "Who is this new woman? I kind of like her.". Not once during the conference did I feel self-conscious of my looks. Not once did I feel inadequate. Not once did I feel lost. God showed me who I really was, why I was there, and confirmed I was where He wanted me. He used other people to speak into my life and encourage me. He opened up the door to conversations that inspired and taught me. It was incredible. His peace surpassed all my understanding that weekend. The whole experience made me even more excited to keep write with God.
I'm so thankful and blessed. God took care of the big and the little things. He took my hand and guided me through the things I thought would overwhelm me. God brought people into my life to encourage, push me, and teach me. I'm still in awe of all that happened and God's amazing faithfulness. I pray you all have the courage to stay the course God has set before you. May you feel His strength inside you as I did. May you feel His love flow through you like I did. May you feel His amazing blessing rain down.
But the feeling faded. I struggle with doubt and fear. I looked at all the things that came with being a writer: rejection, critiques, pitching to agents, editors, publishers, marketing, platforms; and became overwhelmed. In my mind, it took a strong person to put themselves out there, their precious work out there. It took a confident person to be rejected but stay the course. I felt it took a person so secure with themselves that nothing could sway them. That person was not me. I'm insecure. I'm highly introverted. I'm really sensitive. Or so I thought. Two weekends ago, God showed me a whole new me.
I was blessed to attend the 50th Mount Hermon Christian Writers Conference. Not only did I come home with a mind expanded with writing knowledge but knowledge of how God sees me. I can not tell you how many times I looked at myself in a mirror that weekend and said, "Who is this new woman? I kind of like her.". Not once during the conference did I feel self-conscious of my looks. Not once did I feel inadequate. Not once did I feel lost. God showed me who I really was, why I was there, and confirmed I was where He wanted me. He used other people to speak into my life and encourage me. He opened up the door to conversations that inspired and taught me. It was incredible. His peace surpassed all my understanding that weekend. The whole experience made me even more excited to keep write with God.
I'm so thankful and blessed. God took care of the big and the little things. He took my hand and guided me through the things I thought would overwhelm me. God brought people into my life to encourage, push me, and teach me. I'm still in awe of all that happened and God's amazing faithfulness. I pray you all have the courage to stay the course God has set before you. May you feel His strength inside you as I did. May you feel His love flow through you like I did. May you feel His amazing blessing rain down.
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